The Links

Healing Hooters 09:
Officers' Endowments 2

Helen's still going west.

Al

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The Virus

A virus has been deliberately released which will turn the entire female population of the planet into raving bimbettes.  This is a distinctly promising and believable start for a story.  During the first day of infection there would be changes in a woman's sex drive.  The second day brought the beginning of the physical changes.  Women would transform into something out of Playboy.   Breasts would expand, butts would fill out and become more shapely, hair, skin and other things would all begin to look better.  On the third day the personality changes would start, and the other two changes would continue and by the morning of the fourth day the women would be completely changed.  Such a virus has, in fact, been affecting England for some time, although in many cases the second day hasn't quite been perfected yet.
     This story never quite takes off, perhaps because the writer centres on the experiences of one rather dull woman, called Christie.  She moans a lot and gets moist, she has a big scene with a bloke called Bill and an equally big one with a cucumber.  I found myself wondering what happened to the cucumber afterwards — but couldn't get interested in what happened to Bill.  Go figure.
     The writer invites others to use his universe.  It could perhaps be interesting.

Al

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Milk From MIT

A fridge story with the standard male nerd from the lab who brings his work home.   Injured party is his platonic roommate Jenny — another of these proliferating Jennies, although this one is Oriental and a right ugly duckling in appearance — who glugs the carton of strange-tasting milk and gets transformed.
     Peter comes home from a hard day at the lab and gets effectively date-raped by the now rampant, busty and extremely wet Jenny.  Somehow, he can still recognise her, despite everything that has suddenly come between the two of them.
     I have a feeling that I have already been here, done it and polished the car with the T-shirt.  And quite gratifyingly, Mr Anonymous violates the bra-size code twice, which makes a bit of a mess of the marks...

Al

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A Cup Above the Rest

Here's an interesting proposition: a magic spell that makes breasts bigger.   But not just bigger than they were, bigger than anyone else's that happen to be within range.  Must play havoc with a girl's wardrobe.
     Allison is the flat-chested roommate of Lydia, who is conveniently the friendly neighbourhood witch.  There's another roomie called Courtney — sleeping off the effects of a drinking bout — who already has a more than serviceable set of knockers on her.  The spell is cast, and Ally discovers just how well it works when she tops Courtney by the regulation minimum of one cup size.
     The tale explores various possibilites: boyfriends, buying bras, encountering extremely large women, and eventually entering a Biggest Bust Contest.  But matters come to a head when sleepy Courtney gets in on the act.
     Miss Mountains isn't happy with the punctuation in a number of places, but there's nothing bad enough to make the story less enjoyable.  And despite all those new bras Ally keeps needing, she stays the right side of the law by never mentioning the size.

Al

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Blue Undercover
Police Blue — The Movie (The Big End)

In this 25th Century Vole production, we come across the girls again in their unceasing battle with the forces of evil.  As the film opens on board a privately-owned stealth airship, who do we find but the curiously likeable immortal villain, Mr Big, inappropriately dressed but instantly recognisable.  In a universe where most things are possible, a plot to steal all the gold from Fort Knox using an airship seems basically sound.  And in an action-packed first reel, the producers have already squeezed in a dramatic rescue by a pair of pneumatic female feds, a human lawn-dart and a weasel farm.
     For the rest of the 140 minutes, the movie is a bewildering riot as resourceful goodies chase the fiendish baddies.  Tits become larger and smaller and larger again, courtesy of Big's dreaded breast enlargement beam.  As ever in a Police Blue story, the characters are documented using the metric system, apart from their breasts, which are compared throughout to fruit and sports equipment.  Thus, the producers neatly avoid falling foul of the bra-size code violation rule.

Al

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Talk Show BE

This isn't the talk show with the big tits, the fights and the guy with the glasses, it's the one with the black guy with the highly-polished head.  The genial host, concerned neighbour and problem-solver, had as his theme for the week the surpassingly tedious case of the appalling Roy Higgins and his hideous wife Mary, who were considering a divorce.  Unpromising.
     Mary, sadly for Roy, looks nothing like Dolly Parton, to put it gently.  Cue the make-up artist, Sandi — who is in fact female.  Sandi's sister Lisa had recently tried a brand new make-up, and instantly became big sister Lisa.  Good stuff.  A make-over for Mary, and the Higginses will kiss and make up.  But will the magical make-up work for Mary?  Good question.
     Let's not spill the beans about the plot.  We'll just say that a long tape measure is called for and a classic measuring session takes place live on the set of the show.
     This is another story written in the now familiar Adrian Burns whimsical style, always properly edited and presented, always good fun to read.

Al

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